Top 3 Reasons Men Don’t Ask For Help With Mental Health

There is a problem in the world, men don’t ask for help with their mental health and this needs
to be brought to the surface because they suffer too and many times in silence. Research has
shown most awareness strategies are not geared towards mental health in men, the study
showed men relate to humor whereas most mental health programs, advocates, or coaches
take an approach from a softer side but many of the awareness campaigns don’t take this data
into consideration. Mental health in men knows no bounds and can target any race, and does
frequently. Below are the top 3 reasons men don’t ask for help with mental health.

top 3 reasons men don't ask for help with mental health

1. Most men are unaware of their own emotions – Men don’t really talk about their emotions
a lot, it’s all a mystery leading to underdiagnosis or misdiagnosis. This may be a
mistake of a man that is just “acting out” instead of the man suffering from mental health.
Being unaware of these emotions and how to control them some men turn to alcohol or
drugs to help dull issues in mental health in men, which are seen as normal behaviors.
You must be able to admit you need help to get started in the right direction.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

2. Men think it shows a sign of weakness – men worry a lot of times about how it would look
when/if they asked for help. Men like to think they can fix their own problems before
trying to reach out to someone for help, which many problems can be solved this way
but not when it comes to mental health in men. This can also be learned by generations,
if their grandad didn’t think it was important to keep his mental health in check then dad
might follow in his footsteps as not to show weakness which then gets passed down
through generations. You can still be a protector and seek the help you need, you don’t
lose the lack of control when you discuss your emotions or what’s going on in your life.+

3. They feel like a failure – mental health for men tend to express mental health differently
than women, the way men can manifest their symptoms can vary vastly from women;
this can make men feel vulnerable or even out of place. Men with mental health believe
they are supposed to be strong, unshakeable, and tough at all times but the reality is
sometimes it needs to be approached with a softer side which doesn’t make you a failure
or any less masculine. If you don’t know if professional help is right for you then confide
in a friend until you feel comfortable enough discussing your feelings with someone else,
then you’re ready to seek a professional’s opinion.

top 3 reasons men don't ask for help with mental health

If you’re a man struggling with your mental health, no matter your race, it is ok to seek attention,
talk about your feelings, and lose that feeling of failure. When you’re healthy, you perform at your
best which is how you deserve to live your life to the fullest. It is normal to have feelings and
need to share them – get them out in the open so they’ll stop haunting you then you can once
again regain the fun, peace, and happiness back into your life.

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Author

Raina is a psychology student who understands the importance of caring for mental health. She blogs about depression, anxiety, fibromyalgia, men and mental health and parenting kids with ADHD.

20 Comments

  1. Let’s collaborate! I also do a mental health blog (mentalhealthmemoirs.com). I agree with all three of the points you make above. Particularly, the one about showing weakness. I think that many men believe that by expressing feelings they are showing weakness.

    • Kate,
      I am always open to collaboration, let’s get to work. We need to address men’s mental health issues in a way that make it possible for them to express their feeling. It’s going to take a lot of work and patience, but I believe we will get there.

      • Yes!! Men need not fear what getting help will make them look like. I can’t imagine how hard it is for some people. Personally I view as a strength when men look at their emotions and mental challenges and are able to ask for help. I wish more men would realize that needing and getting help doesn’t make you weak! It only makes you human like the rest of us ❤️

  2. Great topic. We really do need to talk about men’s mental health. Most men are raised to think their mental health doesn’t matter, or that they should just pretend it’s not there.

    • Chronic Mom,
      Thanks! We need to start educating our boys our the importance of mental health if we want to make it possible for the next generation of men to care for their mental health.

  3. We have come so far with ending the stigma around mental health yet men seem to be standing still. It’s so sad how frowned upon it is for men to show emotions and let it all out which leads to mental health problems. Thank you for bringing light to this. We need to talk about it more and let any men struggling know that it’s okay to ask for help.

  4. I agree with other commenters that this is an important aspect to address… I think there are positive changes to this in how our generation are raising boys, but as a woman in my 30s I’ve dated so many men in my younger days with real issues around this, and it causes a lot of sadness and unwellness!

    • Anne,

      It’s unfortunate that men suffer in silence with their emotional struggles. I wish they know how important it is for them to talk about it and seek help.

  5. You hit the nail on the head with this one. I delayed asking for help with my depression for years, and those 3 reasons were a bit part of why. Society needs to get over those outdated mindsets. Teaching boys and teens about their emotions would go a long way. Once I started studying them, I stopped seeing them as a weakness, and realized they were a source of strength.

    • George,
      I couldn’t be happier to hear about you seeking help and understanding that it’s a sign of strength and not a weakness to seek help. I appreciate you sharing your experience with me.

  6. Great post. And it is so true. Men are taught to be strong men and not to be emotional. On my podcast a few weeks ago I talked about birth trauma with a dad in the UK. Because of what he went through he is encouraging other dads to seek help when they need it.

    • Courtney.
      I am glad to hear your guest is sharing his experience with birth trauma and is encouraging other dads to do the same. I hope more men will be encouraged to talk about their mental health or other trauma they may have experienced. Thanks for sharing your thought on this matter.

  7. Men’s mental health is often neglected mostly because men themselves avoid talking about their emotional issues. Good, you are talking about it. Hopefully, so will others.

    • Niraj,

      I think men got into this habit because society made it taboo for men to express any other emotions but anger.

  8. Very interesting – you’re connecting many dots here. I didn’t know about the family protector factor that plays a role in the matter at hand. So also learned something new today. Thanks for this very helpful and comprehensive explanation. Love, Susanne

  9. Jimmy Clare Reply

    I guess I am not a typical male then because I know how to ask for help when it comes to my mental health.

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